Comments on: Offend Me Much? http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/2009/01/19/offend-me-much/ Wed, 08 Feb 2012 13:57:35 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.2 By: Andy http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/2009/01/19/offend-me-much/#comment-684 Andy Wed, 04 Feb 2009 21:33:18 +0000 http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/?p=655#comment-684 Maybe England is more liberal about this. Never had a problem... Maybe England is more liberal about this. Never had a problem…

]]> By: Jen http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/2009/01/19/offend-me-much/#comment-656 Jen Thu, 22 Jan 2009 02:47:39 +0000 http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/?p=655#comment-656 LOL. That's generally how I am with feeding Anderson too. I try to be discreet, but I will not nurse him in a bathroom. Eeew. I particularly loved the lady in Limeridge Mall who scooted her kids past me saying "don't look, don't look". He had a blanket over him. You couldn't even see the baby let alone flesh. Indecent exposure indeed. LOL. That’s generally how I am with feeding Anderson too. I try to be discreet, but I will not nurse him in a bathroom. Eeew. I particularly loved the lady in Limeridge Mall who scooted her kids past me saying “don’t look, don’t look”. He had a blanket over him. You couldn’t even see the baby let alone flesh. Indecent exposure indeed.

]]> By: kim http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/2009/01/19/offend-me-much/#comment-654 kim Tue, 20 Jan 2009 14:45:16 +0000 http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/?p=655#comment-654 LOL Kathryn - that's how I feel! How closely do you have to be looking to see something? Now who has the problem? ;) LOL Kathryn - that’s how I feel! How closely do you have to be looking to see something? Now who has the problem? ;)

]]> By: Kathryn http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/2009/01/19/offend-me-much/#comment-653 Kathryn Tue, 20 Jan 2009 14:08:14 +0000 http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/?p=655#comment-653 It's funny because when I nursed Nadia I was all out embarrassed to even be fiddling with my bra under my shirt to latch her on. I really never nursed her in public. Now with Rhys, I try to be discreet and I am, but my mindset has changed so much. I think, hey, if you see flesh you see flesh! It's funny, porn is ok, but nourishing my child isn't? I'm not going to deliberately expose my breast or nipple just to prove a point, but I'm tired of hiding to nurse my baby. I dunno, I guess I've just gotten a 'I don't really care anymore' attitude. If ya see something, ya see something. Guess you won't look again, huh? It’s funny because when I nursed Nadia I was all out embarrassed to even be fiddling with my bra under my shirt to latch her on. I really never nursed her in public. Now with Rhys, I try to be discreet and I am, but my mindset has changed so much. I think, hey, if you see flesh you see flesh! It’s funny, porn is ok, but nourishing my child isn’t? I’m not going to deliberately expose my breast or nipple just to prove a point, but I’m tired of hiding to nurse my baby. I dunno, I guess I’ve just gotten a ‘I don’t really care anymore’ attitude. If ya see something, ya see something. Guess you won’t look again, huh?

]]> By: kim http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/2009/01/19/offend-me-much/#comment-649 kim Mon, 19 Jan 2009 20:52:24 +0000 http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/?p=655#comment-649 Hey Rich! *waves* Thanks for sharing your opinion!! I think you're right - nipple is a bit different from a tasteful, discreet photo, and for the most part, I agree - I don't need to see anyone's nipples!! Hey Rich! *waves* Thanks for sharing your opinion!! I think you’re right - nipple is a bit different from a tasteful, discreet photo, and for the most part, I agree - I don’t need to see anyone’s nipples!!

]]> By: Rich http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/2009/01/19/offend-me-much/#comment-648 Rich Mon, 19 Jan 2009 20:42:33 +0000 http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/?p=655#comment-648 Ok first off I am pro BFing any where any time. I feel it should be a basic human right and protected as such. Alright having said that lets break it down. First what is the difference between BFing in public and posting a BF photo in public. The former is only there for a moment in time. The later is there for all time. Its kind of like being pantsed in public or having a picture of you having being pantsed posted in public. One our butt is there and gone in a flash, the other you butt is hanging out for ever to be viewed for as long and as close as someone wants. So there is a "time to live" difference BFing may provide a flash of a nipple where a BFing photo will capture and freeze time at the moment of that quick flash. Second is not being allowed to post BFing photos really denying a mother or baby anything? No. If you want to share the photos you can still do it privately or through another means that allows it. As Jen pointed out a nipple is a nipple. In a BF photo or a centerfold photo a nipple is still a nipple (but yes exposed for two completely different reasons) And Third what is the child sees the photo? Well big whoop as Jen said if Anderson wants to see them that's no problem. But what if his 10 year old friends find them? The social scars could take a while to heal. And lets face it kids don't need extra fuel to make other kids social outcasts. And if the kids are 16 ..... well there will be no end to it. Now having said all this there should be no problem with BFing photos that do not display any nipple. If you want to see "side boob" go look at a bikini store site or the bra section of Sears. I think that is what the people at Facebook made the decision on. It was not an issue of allowing BFing photos or not, rather nipple or no nipple. I think the right choice was made based on the Facebook rules that every one needs to adhere to. Then there is the issue that nipple exposure is allowed in the streets of Canada (toplessness), and I fully support it, Facebook is international and have set their own rules and guidelines for use. (sorry had to be a guy for a moment there :) ). Ok first off I am pro BFing any where any time. I feel it should be a basic human right and protected as such.
Alright having said that lets break it down.

First what is the difference between BFing in public and posting a BF photo in public. The former is only there for a moment in time. The later is there for all time. Its kind of like being pantsed in public or having a picture of you having being pantsed posted in public. One our butt is there and gone in a flash, the other you butt is hanging out for ever to be viewed for as long and as close as someone wants.
So there is a “time to live” difference BFing may provide a flash of a nipple where a BFing photo will capture and freeze time at the moment of that quick flash.

Second is not being allowed to post BFing photos really denying a mother or baby anything? No. If you want to share the photos you can still do it privately or through another means that allows it. As Jen pointed out a nipple is a nipple. In a BF photo or a centerfold photo a nipple is still a nipple (but yes exposed for two completely different reasons)

And Third what is the child sees the photo? Well big whoop as Jen said if Anderson wants to see them that’s no problem. But what if his 10 year old friends find them? The social scars could take a while to heal. And lets face it kids don’t need extra fuel to make other kids social outcasts. And if the kids are 16 ….. well there will be no end to it.

Now having said all this there should be no problem with BFing photos that do not display any nipple. If you want to see “side boob” go look at a bikini store site or the bra section of Sears. I think that is what the people at Facebook made the decision on. It was not an issue of allowing BFing photos or not, rather nipple or no nipple. I think the right choice was made based on the Facebook rules that every one needs to adhere to. Then there is the issue that nipple exposure is allowed in the streets of Canada (toplessness), and I fully support it, Facebook is international and have set their own rules and guidelines for use.
(sorry had to be a guy for a moment there :) ).

]]> By: kim http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/2009/01/19/offend-me-much/#comment-647 kim Mon, 19 Jan 2009 14:32:22 +0000 http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/?p=655#comment-647 LOL - I hear you! Actually though, I have seen many pictures taken in the early 1900s that reporters took of families that show the woman with her bodice down feeding the baby - sitting in the middle of her house, talking to the reporter who is taking pictures. So, while that long ago they might not have *posted* pictures of themselves, they certainly weren't shy about other people taking pictures of them! I wouldn't put up revealing pictures of myself breastfeeding, just as I wouldn't put up a revealing picture of myself doing anything else, but I don't think that breastfeeding should stay hidden. If we continue to treat breastfeeding like it's something to hide, what in our culture will change? LOL - I hear you! Actually though, I have seen many pictures taken in the early 1900s that reporters took of families that show the woman with her bodice down feeding the baby - sitting in the middle of her house, talking to the reporter who is taking pictures. So, while that long ago they might not have *posted* pictures of themselves, they certainly weren’t shy about other people taking pictures of them!

I wouldn’t put up revealing pictures of myself breastfeeding, just as I wouldn’t put up a revealing picture of myself doing anything else, but I don’t think that breastfeeding should stay hidden. If we continue to treat breastfeeding like it’s something to hide, what in our culture will change?

]]> By: Jen http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/2009/01/19/offend-me-much/#comment-646 Jen Mon, 19 Jan 2009 13:29:09 +0000 http://kblog.theschellingerhoudts.com/?p=655#comment-646 Hmmmm, this is a tough one. While I am a huge supporter of breastfeeding, being able to do it wherever you need to in order to feed your child (I too, BF in public) and believing that it is a beautiful natural thing, in some ways I see her point. 50 years ago, would anyone wanted to have publicly posted pictures of their breasts (for whatever reason)? I think her point that modesty has changed is very true. We are from a generation that shares much more intimate detail about our lives than ever before. As my mom always says "I can't believe you talk about x, y, or z with your friends. We never talked about that when I was growing up." Whether or not our "tell all" mentality is a good thing is a whole other debate! As for Facebook, I choose not to post such pictures up because that's just not within my comfort zone. And she is right, the internet is not totally secure. Some people feel ok doing that. It personally doesn't bother me one bit. Other people, it might. The age of kids on Facebook/the internet is getting younger and younger, and you never know who is looking over your shoulder. I think that teaching kids about breastfeeding is a good thing to do, to show them that it's normal natural and healthy. But, when it comes to the internet, you just never know if that parent is around to explain why one nipple is ok to show but the other isn't. I have taken breastfeeding pictures but they are more for me than anyone else. I find them special, and they are in a folder in my computer for me to look at. I am sure Anderson won't care to see those when he's 18 :) If he does, he is welcome to them! While I think the way she wrote the article was crass and rude, I think there is an element of truth to it that was just really poorly worded. And, well, in balance to all of the other pro-breastfeeding articles out there, she is entitled to her own opinion, right? I just let it roll of my shoulder and wonder if she's ever been a breastfeeding mom herself to have such a cold perception about it. Thought I'd play devil's advocate...debate! :) :) :) Hmmmm, this is a tough one.

While I am a huge supporter of breastfeeding, being able to do it wherever you need to in order to feed your child (I too, BF in public) and believing that it is a beautiful natural thing, in some ways I see her point.

50 years ago, would anyone wanted to have publicly posted pictures of their breasts (for whatever reason)? I think her point that modesty has changed is very true. We are from a generation that shares much more intimate detail about our lives than ever before. As my mom always says “I can’t believe you talk about x, y, or z with your friends. We never talked about that when I was growing up.” Whether or not our “tell all” mentality is a good thing is a whole other debate!

As for Facebook, I choose not to post such pictures up because that’s just not within my comfort zone. And she is right, the internet is not totally secure. Some people feel ok doing that. It personally doesn’t bother me one bit. Other people, it might. The age of kids on Facebook/the internet is getting younger and younger, and you never know who is looking over your shoulder. I think that teaching kids about breastfeeding is a good thing to do, to show them that it’s normal natural and healthy. But, when it comes to the internet, you just never know if that parent is around to explain why one nipple is ok to show but the other isn’t.

I have taken breastfeeding pictures but they are more for me than anyone else. I find them special, and they are in a folder in my computer for me to look at. I am sure Anderson won’t care to see those when he’s 18 :) If he does, he is welcome to them!

While I think the way she wrote the article was crass and rude, I think there is an element of truth to it that was just really poorly worded. And, well, in balance to all of the other pro-breastfeeding articles out there, she is entitled to her own opinion, right? I just let it roll of my shoulder and wonder if she’s ever been a breastfeeding mom herself to have such a cold perception about it.

Thought I’d play devil’s advocate…debate! :) :) :)

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